When I first became a mom, I would often tell people how sanctifying parenting is. From the earliest days of functioning with little sleep and refusing to let that be an excuse to sin, to the toddler years where you begin to see your own unrighteous tendencies copied by the tiny people in your home, being a parent teaches you a lot about how selfish you are, how selfless you can be, and what it means to lay down your life for the sake of another. Many people talk about how having children provides you with a whole new perspective on love, and it is true, but it also quickly reveals what true love costs, and how reluctant we can be to pay that price, sometimes even for our own kids.
As my parenting years have increased, I have learned a few other things about how God uses the kids He entrusts to us for His good purposes. One of the ways that He uses our parenting is that as our kids go out into the world, they are showcases of what we have taught them at home. Of course, this is not intended to imply that our children perfectly follow every instruction we give them once they leave our doors (and we certainly can attest that they do not do so within the walls of our house.) But when our kids are interacting with other people, they display what they have learned about how to treat others, how to respond to difficulties and what are the most important things in life. Their lives – in big and small ways- testify to what we have taught them. Our desire should be that their lives reflect a home that is committed to love God and others well.
And we should be quick to recognize that if their lives reflect this they are going to stand apart from other kids. Young hearts that have been trained to treat others with kindness and respect, who are encouraged to prefer others over themselves, and who have seen modeled self-control rather than lack of it, are going to be different from their peers. That difference gives us an opportunity. Other parents will notice that our kids are not the same as others, and they will ask us about it. When this occurs, we should be quick to point them to Jesus and the Truth of God’s Word as the foundation of our lives. We should be ready to testify that it is not the latest life hack or parenting blog that enables us to parent as we do, but the grace of God in our lives. We should use the observations about our parenting (and our kids) to showcase God’s goodness, and not to highlight the admirable qualities of our children. It is His kindness and mercy that gave us the kids we have, and any good that we do in parenting is attributable to Him alone. We should embrace that and be quick to acknowledge it to others.
When someone compliments our kids, we may be tempted to brush it off, to beam with pride, or to use it as an opportunity to agree with their observation. Precious saints – let’s recognize that instead, we should be prepared to use it as an opportunity for the Gospel. People may want to know about our parenting techniques, but they need to know about Jesus. Let us be prepared to turn the attention to Him, to use our parenting as an opportunity to showcase the love and grace of our Heavenly Father that many more people may become His kids.
