Relationships

How My Mom Makes A Difference

As long-time readers of the blog know I have a bit of a tradition going where I write about how people have made a difference in my life. It’s my way of acknowledging some of the richest blessings God has given me. It is unfortunate that up to this point I have yet to write about my mom. It isn’t for a lack of material; in fact, the exact opposite is true. It is hard to encapsulate in a mere blog post all the ways that my mom makes a difference. Because of that, this may be the first of many such posts. It is fitting however, that I at least attempt to articulate how my mom has enriched my life and the life of others. There are few people I know who so consistently make a difference for God’s Kingdom yet do so in such an understated and often unrecognized way. The main way she does this? She’s a servant. It’s one of the first words I think of when I think of my mom and one of the things that I’m convinced she will be most acclaimed for when she meets her Lord. Here are just some of the ways my mom makes a difference through how she serves:

She serves faithfully. – As anyone who has had the privilege of serving alongside my mom knows, if she commits to do something, you can all but guarantee that she will do it. She is often the first person to be somewhere and the last to leave. It doesn’t matter what role has been assigned to her, she will do whatever bit of service is most needed in order to ensure that the ministry she has committed to is carried out with excellence. I can’t think of a single time that she refused to do any particular task. As a teacher she taught her students the importance of diligence and she is a living representation of it. She serves unwaveringly and tirelessly, pouring out her life in order to bless others.

She serves expansively. – Not only does my mom serve faithfully, but she serves in a variety of different capacities and ministries. From leading a junior high small group, to coming alongside young moms, to reach out to those who, like her, have lost their husbands, if she sees someone in need and believes that there is a way she might be able to bless them, she is there to do so.  She cooks meals, babysits kids, teaches Truth, prays fervently, shares wisdom and does a variety of other things. It seems that almost any time our church puts out a call for volunteers, my mom is checking her schedules and commitments to see if there is one more way that she can minister to others.  She doesn’t restrict herself to those areas of service where she is most comfortable or where she is most naturally inclined. Anyone and everyone is a potential object of her ministry commitment.

She serves with love. – It would be easy to read what has been written so far and to think that my mom serves so well because she is such a hard worker and she is excellent at managing her schedule. But to come to that conclusion would miss one of the most important reasons that my mom is so effective in her service; she loves those that she serve. Again, because she serves in so many different ways this means she loves so many different people. She cries for them when they hurt, she prays for them when they struggle and she cheers for them when she sees God’s good work in their life. For my mom, serving isn’t about getting things done. It is about loving others so that through doing so, they may experience the love of Christ.

She serves to serve her Savior. – The single most important thing to know about my mom and her commitment to serve is that ultimately it is not the people that she is ministering to who are the object of her service. She serves them because when she does so she is serving Christ. I am convinced this alone is the reason everything else I have written above is true. She serves faithfully, expansively and with love because when she looks at those she ministers to she sees the sacrifice, grace and forgiveness of her Savior. She may grow weary, but she knows that He does not. It may seem that she has been overlooked, but she knows that the One who matters sees it all. It’s because she loves her Lord that she serves those He has placed in her path. It’s because He was a servant (Mt. 20:28) that she has committed her life to the same.

As you can see from what I’ve written, my mom is an exceptional human being. The fact that God choose such a woman to be my mom is one of the greatest blessings He has ever given me. I have learned so much through her words and through the way she lives her life. I know that I’m not alone in that regard.

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Relationships

Lessons of the 4th Month

If anyone is keeping track you know that this post is a bit late. I’m learning that sometimes life with an infant is just like that. Your days, weeks and months are hard to predict, and just when you think you can, they learn a new behavior or pick up a new habit and the whole schedule shifts. Thankfully, there’s little chance of being bored. Even more thankfully there are lots of lessons to still learn. So here are some of the ones I learned during my little one’s fourth month:

Laughter is good for the soul – I know this isn’t exactly a new lesson (see Proverbs 17:22). However, there is nothing quite like the first time your child knowingly and consciously gives you a big belly laugh. All of a day’s troubles can seem to momentarily disappear as you watch their face light up. If you can get them to do this repeatedly, several times in a row – that’s a huge bonus. In the hustle and bustle of things we can forget the joy that comes from a good laugh and we can be quick to dismiss those moments of simple joy. It’s important to cherish them when they come. Sometimes they will be few and far between which makes them all the more precious and sweet.

Pray over the little things – It’s probably not uncommon for new parents to spend a lot of time in prayer. There are so many unknowns with raising a little life. When they are young, it’s hard to tell if you are doing a good job since their cries can mean anything from “I’m tired” to “I’m in pain.” to “I am just having a rough day and this is the only way I know to express it. Personally, I found myself spending time in prayer over my little girl’s future but didn’t dedicate enough time to praying over those seemingly “insignificant” things that can rock a new mom’s day. God cares about the birds of the air and the lilies of the field (Mt. 6:25-30); He certainly cares about whether my little one is learning to nap. I need to seek His wisdom and help in all things – not just the ones that seem readily obvious are outside of my control.

Be careful what you say – Having two nieces is often a great reminder that I need to be careful with my words; I don’t want to say anything that I wouldn’t want them repeating. However, my four-month old has taught me that this vigilance should happen a lot sooner. We have sung songs to her since before she was born and after she arrived it was how we spent a considerable part of her awake time. As we have done so, she has learned to “stand” when we say that word (she holds onto our hands, of course, but the effort to stand when she hears the word is all hers). Already she’s picking up on things that are going on around her and learning to respond accordingly. My words should reflect the kind of heart that I want my child to have – a heart that is pleasing to God.

Say “yes” to help – I’ve written before about the blessing of helping hands, but it bears repeating. People who are willing to do things for you are gifts to be treasured. It’s easy to think that you should have things together – after all, your child is four months old already! But, as already mentioned, things are constantly changing and when you think that you have a handle on things, that’s just about the time that you can get knocked off your feet. I think it’s also important to realize that there’s likely a spiritual element at play here. Not only are we to “bear one another’s burdens” (Gal. 6:2) but Satan would probably like few things better than to make us feel alone, discouraged and without support. When people offer to help – take it. When they don’t offer and you need it – say so. And make sure you are relying on the Helper. Being a parent is too big of a job to do it in your own strength.

Tricks of the Trade – Some things you don’t ever learn until you are a mom. Here are some I’ve learned:

a) Get a mobile that runs on batteries – not a wind-up one. Trust me – when your child has woken up for the umpteenth time because their wind-up mobile ran out just as they were falling asleep, you will thank me.

b) Sunshine is a great stain remover. If onsies, blankets, burp cloths, etc. get soiled (and they will), hang them in the sun. This worked better than any chemical compound I found.

c) If your child adopts a “lovey” or you want them to, get two of them. If one gets dirty (or worse yet, lost!) they can still have their precious security blanket to cling to.

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