Leading Generously

One of my favorite stories to tell my students involves my dad. It was a story that I didn’t hear until after God called him Home. When he died, the company my dad worked for started a leadership award in his honor. To be nominated for the award a person had to meet three criteria – criteria that defined how my dad led. They had to solve a problem, they had to involve other people in the solution, and they had to propose a solution that was systematic in nature. In other words, they had to make a difference in the company by working with other people to provide a long-term fix to a problem that repeatedly occurred.

The first recipient of the award was a woman that my dad hired. When she accepted the award, she told the story of her first few weeks on the job. Apparently there had been a mix-up with the set-up of her direct deposit and her first paycheck wasn’t going to arrive on the scheduled date. My dad got word of this and dropped by her office to chat. Knowing that bills still need to be paid even if a paycheck doesn’t come in, he asked her if she was going to be o.k. Reflecting on this story, she said, “I’m pretty sure Brad was prepared to write me a personal check.” As she shared this at the award ceremony, my mom leaned over and told me that’s exactly what my dad had planned. Although it wasn’t his fault that the check hadn’t come in, he recognized that a member of his team was in a tough situation. He had talked to my mom the evening before, and they had agreed that they would be willing to give up some of their resources to help meet any need. As his employee told the story it was clear that this incident in her first two weeks of work set the tone for how she viewed my dad as a boss, and more importantly, as a person. She knew that my dad was willing to sacrifice for the good of someone on his team.

The reason I love to tell this story is because it is reflective of who my dad was in every aspect of life. As I often say, he characterized what it means to be “a cheerful giver” (2 Cor. 9:7). However, most people think this propensity to generosity is something that is reflected in one’s personal, not professional, life. Through this and other acts of selfless giving, my dad demonstrated that for the Christian, generosity belongs at work too. This simple act of kindness demonstrated to this employee and to the rest of his team that he took his faith seriously. It showed them that loving God and loving others wasn’t something that was just important to him on the weekend; it was going to impact the way that he treated them at the office. In short, it demonstrated that he took the Gospel seriously and when he was asked why he was so generous to others, it gave him the opportunity to share how much God had done for him.

When we give selflessly, we reflect the selflessness of our Savior. In the story I shared above, my dad was preparing to give of his financial resources, but there are other ways that we can sacrificially give to bless those with whom we work. We can give of our time, willing to listen to and help with their struggles rather than focusing on the challenges we face. We can give of our talents, being willing to use our gifts and abilities to help someone else. We can give of our opportunities, allowing someone else to shine instead of trying to make sure the spotlight is always on us. Regardless of the way in which we do it, when we generously sacrifice for the sake of someone else, we are modeling, in some small way, the sacrifice that Christ made for us.  We are providing a foothold to the Gospel and showing those around us, whether at work or the community, that we are willing to give up what is rightfully ours that they may be blessed. We are showing we prioritize them as image bearers of God, and that because of this, we will be generous to them with what God has given us.

In a world where people often focus on what they can get rather than what they give, a Christian can make a Kingdom difference by being sacrificially generous. If this Christian is also a leader in some way, the impact can be even greater. When we give of ourselves to bless others, we are showcasing the sacrifice and love of our Savior. May our colleagues and our community increasingly think of us as those who are joyfully generous. May we lead people to Jesus by willing give of what He has graciously given to us.   


As for the rich in this present age, charge them not to be haughty, nor to set their hopes on the uncertainty of riches, but on God, who richly provides us with everything to enjoy. They are to do good, to be rich in good works, to be generous and ready to share, thus storing up treasure for themselves as a good foundation for the future, so that they may take hold of that which is truly life.

I Timothy 6:17-19
Continue Reading

How to Help When You Are the Point Person

Recently I shared some practical tips on how to help those who are in crisis. However, when you are in the “inner circle” of someone going through pain, the opportunities you have to help become even greater. That is because you may have the responsibility of helping to figure out how others can help. Stated differently, you may become the “gatekeeper” that others turn to for how to best assist the person who is grieving, or who just received a devastating diagnosis, or who is facing an uncertain and scary circumstance. When this is the case, some additional tips may help you fill this role in a way that not only aids the person in need, but also helps you bear their burdens without getting crushed by them. 

So if you are close to the person in pain and people are seeking your direction for how to help, here are some tips on what to do: 

Be Prepared 

It may seem antithetical to be prepared for something you don’t know is coming, but this is exactly what you should do. This is especially true if you are a ministry or small group leader, or in some other way you are naturally the point of contact for some collection of people when they face an emergency. Some specific ways that you can be prepared include:

  • Have emergency contact information for people in your group – If you have single adults that you are in some way shepherding, please make sure you know how to contact their extended family members if something happens to them. Tracking down contact information for children or parents is difficult to do if you have never met them. Hopefully you will never have an occasion to utilize someone’s emergency contact, but it is better to have the information somewhere readily accessible in case you do.
  • Have meals in freezer – One of my standard ways of being prepared for crisis is to make sure I have a prepared meal in the freezer that I can bring without much notice.  I usually try for something hearty (like lasagna or enchiladas) so that if I don’t have a lot of “sides” readily available in my fridge, I can still bring something that is substantive and will feed a family.
  • Know favorite restaurants or food orders -In the small group that my husband and I lead, there are a lot of food restrictions. It would be nearly impossible for me to always keep meals on hand that would meet the requirements of each family. Therefore, if I know that someone in our group is unlikely to be able to eat our “go to” freezer meal, I try to know their favorite restaurant or meals they grab when they need something quick to eat. In the cases when I can’t bring a homemade meal on short notice, I usually can pick up something at a restaurant or order a meal to be delivered to their door.
  • Be familiar with your church’s support structure – If there is a crisis in the life of someone in your small group, one of the things you want to be able do is alert a pastor or ministry leader. It is helpful if you know the method for doing this before the emergency occurs. Perhaps your church has a pastor of the week that is on-call during that timeframe. Perhaps there is a help line that all needs are funneled through. Maybe there is a prayer chain contact that needs to be alerted. Whatever the process is for getting others in the church involved in praying for and supporting the person in need, make sure you know it.

Get Organized

When you realize that you are going to become the point of contact in a crisis, it is important to get organized as soon as you can. This may not happen immediately upon hearing the bad news, but as soon as you start to get an idea of what help is needed, and how long it will be needed for, it is helpful to start creating a process for ensuring those needs are met. I have used a few different methods to do this including a Google Doc that can be shared as people offer to help, or an online sign up form like takemthemameal.com or signupgenius.com. The best method to use is one that you are familiar with and that you can easily add additional needs to as they arise. While a text thread is often helpful when the situation first occurs, I recommend not relying on it if the needs extend beyond a day or two. Some type of form that you can access and that allows people to see the needs without you needing to continue to send them out as more offers for help come in is beneficial. Plus, depending on the situation, the person in need may also want to see the form. For example, there are times when we have done meal signups for a few months, and it is helpful if the person receiving the meals can see who is bringing them and what they are bringing. You want a system that is clear, that is easy to access and easy to share, plus adaptable to changing circumstances. The more organized you are, the more help you will be to the person in need, and the more you will be able to ensure others can help too. 

Make Needs Known

Part of the reason it is important to get organized is because you want to have an easy way of making needs known.  My personal philosophy is that you want to let others know of the needs that arise as much as possible, so you can take care of the things that the person in the difficult situation needs only you to do. I think it is wise to throw as many needs as you can on your sign up list, so that you can focus on the truly urgent or the very personal needs. As I mentioned in my previous post, in one situation that I was the point of contact for, one of the needs that arose was getting the dog a bath. Of course, I could have done that and would have done it, if no one had stepped in. However, by making the need known, it allowed another friend an opportunity to help which she desperately wanted to do. And it meant I could help my friend who was grieving with other pressing concerns that had come up. A meal sign up is great, but perhaps there is other practical help that the person in pain needs. Whether it is watering a garden, running errands or bathing a dog – when you are made aware of a need, make sure you let others know of it too. 

Let Others Help Too

Of course, being organized and making needs known requires a commitment to letting other people help. Just because you are close to a person doesn’t mean that you have to or should do all the work. As intimated in the paragraph above, if you are close to the person in need, there may be some things that they only want you to do. Therefore, you need to concentrate on those things, and let others help bear the burden with other tasks. My general rule – if someone offers to help, try to think of a way that they can. For example, a while ago my mom’s friend was in Australia when she found out my mom was hospitalized. Obviously, she couldn’t bring a meal or run errands, but she asked if there was anything my mom could use from Amazon. This made me realize that my mom’s hospitalization may be a bit easier with Bluetooth headphones, which she previously didn’t have. If you can prevent it, don’t let an offer to help go to waste. Let people pitch in. It will not only make things easier on you as one of the frontliners, but both the person in need and the person providing the help will be blessed as a result. 

As I shared previously, the above recommendations are just that – my recommendations. I am sure that the list is not comprehensive, and I am sure others can come up with more creative ways of helping people in need. Also, as I emphasized in the original post, all of these actions need to start and be undergirded with prayer. As you prayerfully consider how to best serve the person in crisis, God may direct you to different ways of meeting their needs. But I hope that if you are on the frontline of ministering, these suggestions here may help you engage in that service even more effectively. 

Continue Reading