Purpose

Perceptions of Greatness

One of the hardest lessons that is learned on our journey to adulthood is that we are not what we think we are. The perception that we have of ourselves is rarely the same perception that others have of us. This can be both good and bad. For example, I tend to be my own worse critic so in a way this could be good news for me. On the other hand, I also think that I’m pretty witty, and the fact that few might find my humor laughable kind of makes this bad news. We tend to think of ourselves as being a certain way, and because we are intimately aware with our inner thoughts, feelings and motivations, we are justified in believing that this is who we really are. But others aren’t privy to this internal dialog, so they form their opinion based solely on the part of our lives with which they have experience.

Leaders, maybe more than any others, have the potential to be the hardest hit as a result of this consideration. After all, their behaviors are observed by a greater number of people than those who aren’t leading, and leaders are less likely to be really known by those that follow. As my dad has told me “it’s lonely at the top”. Being in a position of leadership means that there are few people who can relate to you; there are only a few that understand you. Even these individuals can not fully appreciate the struggles that a leader must go through and the careful balance that must be maintained between the various contingencies. Leaders are known of by many, but only known by a few. Perceptions of who a leader is abounds, understanding of the leader is scarce. And perhaps the hardest part of the equation is that the reality matters very little. Perception will form the basis of judgment. Many leaders try to manage perception but after awhile that gets pretty futile too. Each person will interpret actions based on their own experiences and biases. Leaders can not make decisions and consider these hidden agendas.

So, what is a leader to do? The right thing. It is only through doing what the leader knows to be right that the leader can be sure that perception doesn’t matter. The leader has made a decision based on what he or she believes will accomplish the most good and which will serve his or her followers. If its a Christian leader, they will also be motivated by the opportunity to bring God the greatest amount of glory. Knowing that the decision is concurrent with the right thing to do, makes misperceptions easier to manage. Even if misperceptions persist, the leader can rest in the knowledge that their decision was motivated by the proper reasons and that the final judgment will vindicate them.

Leadership is never easy. Being judged by others isn’t either. Knowing that you did the right thing can make both manageable.

“One of the hardest tasks of leadership is understanding that you are not what you are, but what you’re perceived to be by others.”
–Edward L. Flom,

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Hope Purpose

Starts with Goodbye

I’ll often tell people that I hate goodbyes. The reason I say this is because its true. I do hate goodbyes. There are probably several reasons for this, many of which have been explored elsewhere on this blog. From the feeling that something is ending to the loss of control, goodbyes are not my strong suit.

I know that I’m not alone in my distaste. Goodbyes have caused pain since the beginning of time. In fact, in a sense, God’s punishment for man’s sin was a goodbye – an eternal separation from God’s presence. It’s why we talk about Jesus providing a way back to God – we were separated from something we once knew and our relationship needed to be restored. Goodbyes are often associated with bad things and we rarely look forward to them with anticipation.

But goodbyes are also necessary things. As Carrie Underwood sings, “sometimes moving on with the rest of your life starts with goodbye”. You can’t take hold of what’s next until you let go of what you have. It’s like the third grader who tries to grab the next run on the monkey bars without ever picking up her hand. It’s impossible to do. The moment of faith and despair that lingers as the hand moves from one bar to the next is necessary for forward progress. It’s a step that must be taken and letting go of what she already posses is required. So it is with us, we must step out in faith to move forward.

Just like the girl on the monkey bars, there’s that moment where we’re holding on to nothing. As our hand swings from one bar to the next, there’s a huge chance we might fall. In fact, in no other time in our journey does excitement and fear mingle so closely together. But the progress that’s made makes embracing the fear worth the effort. And the excitement of what’s next propels us onward.

The thing to remember is that sometimes we have to let go of good things to move on to even better. Letting go is not an acknowledgment that we don’t care. It is, however, an acknowledgment that the time has come for something else. And whatever that something is, God has ordained it for a particular time and place in our lives. To miss it, would be missing out on His blessings. To eschew it, would be denying His will for our lives.

This doesn’t mean that I’ll start liking goodbyes, but it does mean that I can approach them with a heavenly perspective, recognizing that even in the sadness of losing something, God is preparing something that is good.

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