Purpose

What Remains

The practice of perseverance has long fascinated me.  Perhaps it’s because I’m the daughter and the granddaughter of Marines, but I’m drawn to the stories of endurance, of people who exhibit stick-to-itiveness even when the odds are stacked against them. My “life verse” is  James 1:12 in which the writers extols the reward for the child of God who perseveres when trials abound. I want to be the kind of person who keeps putting one foot in front of the other, even when things around me seem weighty, trusting that it’s God, and not I, who carries the load.

Despite my penchant for perseverance,  I don’t think I’ve ever fully appreciated how it relates to other aspects of the Christian faith. In reading I Corinthians 13:13, Paul writes that it is faith, hope and love that endures, not my stubborn determination.  My perseverance shouldn’t be prompted by trust in myself, but instead, by the faith, hope and love that comes from God.

Growing up, I was used to hearing I Corinthians 13:13 in the New International Version which states that faith, hope and love remain. The challenge is that it is easy to think of “what remains” as what is leftover – as what we’re stuck with after everything else is gone. However, the word used here is  really the same word that is used describe a Christian’s relationship with Christ. That word is “abide.”  In John 15:4, Jesus teaches His disciples, “Abide in me and I in you.”  In other words, if you are His child, you need to remain steadfast in Him, as He remains steadfast in you, in order that you might endure to the end. It means staying with Him, which doesn’t mean standing still. It means going where He leads; walking the path that He’s on; holding close to Him;  following in His steps.

In a similar way, faith, hope and love are not passive. They are not leftovers;  they are what lasts. And if I want to endure, they should characterize my life as well.

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Relationships

The Blessing of Marriage

It’s a funny thing how our sinful hearts work. Not “haha” funny – but mind-boggling, ridiculous kind of funny. If you talk to most unmarried Christian women, they are longing for that day when they will be married. They look forward to it with eager anticipation, hopeful of all the good things that will come from pledging their lives to be bound to one man until death separates them. However, if you talk to most married women, they are usually full of complaints. What once seemed like a privilege, now seems like a hassle. What was once eagerly anticipated, is now thoughtlessly disregarded. 

People might be tempted to offer explanations for this phenomenom. When we are young and hopeful we don’t anticipate the challenges and trails that come from married life. Additionally, as the old saying goes, “familiarity breeds contempt” and what once seemed exciting has lost it’s luster. However, I’m inclined to think our sinful hearts and our short-term memory are the best explanation. We neglect to remember that what seems like a burden was once a blessing we longed for.  We are quick to forget that marriage is a privilege and a gift.

Usually this forgetfulness rears its ugly head when we are tired of the many “have to’s” of marriage. We don’t want to have to clean up after someone else. We don’t want to have to adjust our schedule to accomodate theirs. And the list could go on. However, instead of “have to’s” we should be thinking of these things as “get to’s”  We get the blessing of sharing our lives with someone that we can serve everyday in simple yet meaningful ways. We get to participate in another’s lives – learning from their dispositions, interests and activities. When the “have tos” become “get tos” our hearts and our minds are rightly considering the blessing that marriage is.

One pastor is fond of saying that it’s only because our spouse isn’t perfect that we get the opportunity to glorify God in our marriage. In other words, the things that frustrate us about our spouse are actually a chance for us to demonstrate God’s grace, love, and mercy. The blessing of marriage isn’t that we have to contend with the challenges that matriomony holds, it’s that we get to do it in a way that display’s God’s goodness to someone we love, and to a watching world.

 

How does changing our perspective from “have to” to “get to” change how we interact with our spouse?

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