Pain is Personal

I have a dear friend (miss you, Gini) who likes to say “Pain is personal.” Since she’s had more than her fair share of troubles to deal with, I’m inclined to go with her insight on this subject. Pain is personal – we evaluate our hardships based on our own experiences and our own perceptions of how things should be. Despite our best attempts, it’s very hard to experience another person’s pain.

I’ve been reminded of my friend’s wisdom repeatedly in the last few days. The reminders have come most frequently through a little boy who is visiting the community with his family. His family is from the States and although I doubt that in their home country they are considered wealthy, they have a lot compared to anyone in this village. However, this is lost on this little boy. His first night here he complained repeatedly about a slight scratch on his finger. Additionally, in a car crammed with 18 people, he was very concerned about his comfort. When offered dinner, he wanted to know about other available options. All of this is understandable – he is used to having these things be of importance. But surrounded by kids who’s feet are so scratched up they probably will never heal, who take a seat where its given regardless of their comfort, and who are blessed just to have enough to eat, its difficult not to see the contrast. The children of this community have a broader perspective on pain and so their relation to it is much different. The things that may seem major to the little American boy are of no concern to them.

I was reminded of how personal pain is again today. I woke up with a stomach virus and spent most of the morning sleeping (quick side bar to reduce my mother’s worry – I feel much better.) After church we intended to go on our Christmas visits, delivering food, clothes and blankets to those in need. Juli had prescribed rest, and so I slept through church, but was determined to go on the home visits. It was a good day, and I believe that the four families we visited will have a better Christmas as a result. However, my slight illness quickly became of little concern when we visited the home of Hannah. Hannah is a lady who has a benign tumor in her face that due to lack of medical care has grown beyond where it’s operable. This rampant growth of cells has changed the bone structure in her face as it seeks to expand into every cavity. Even with pain medication, she hadn’t slept for three days. Despite her obvious discomfort, her gratitude for our visit was abundantly expressed. This woman, who has so much to worthy of complaint, raised her hands and sang with us:

What a Friend we have in Jesus
All our sins and grief to bear
What a privilege to carry
Everything to God in prayer

Pain is personal. Thankfully, so is our God.

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Good God, Bad World

In what many what deem coincidence (and others would call God’s providence), I have had the opportunity to recently talk with several different people on how a good God could allow such a bad world. If you think about it for even a half a second, it doesn’t make sense. The world is categorically unfair – the innocent are abused, justice is neglected, and good is repaid with evil, and If the world made any sense, none of these would be true. And yet time and time again, bad things are perpetrated against those who least deserve it.

The truth of the matter is that there is no easy way to explain this. The part of us that says “This should not be” is the part of us that is echoing God’s heart. I believe that we will never fully grasp why things are the way they are as long as we are on this side of heaven. Some people aren’t comfortable with that – they think everything must be explained – but I don’t. I don’t understand gravity but I totally believe in its impact on my life. It’s similar with some things of faith; I don’t understand why they are the way they are, I just know them to be true. Secondly, I think that we tend to view these situations in one of two ways: we think either God should have prevented them or we think God caused them. When we frustrated because God doesn’t stop bad things from happening, we forget that bad things happen for two reasons – 1) as consequences of sin or 2) because we live in a fallen world. In the first category, when we choose to go against God’s directives in our lives, I think its unfair of us to complain about suffering the consequences. I think this is a more difficult argument to make when we suffer because other people choose not to follow God’s directives in their lives, but I think the principle still holds. My best analogy is my parents. I know that they love me and that there are times that they could have probably stopped me from suffering because other people were treating me badly – but they recognized that part of the growing process is dealing with the fact that other people aren’t perfect. In the same way – God could prevent us from suffering from other people’s sins, but a lot of time He doesn’t because sin begets consequences. That’s the natural order of things. The more amazing thing is that sometimes He does spare us the consequences. The fact that He doesn’t always doesn’t detract from His love; the fact that He sometimes does is evidence of it.

The second category of bad things – the things like Hurricane Katrina or the tsunami – those are even more difficult. Presumably no sin caused those things to happen. That’s when I just have to chalk it up to the fact that we live in a fallen world and that things aren’t always as God intended them. He’s promised that they will be someday, but they aren’t here. In this category – I kind of think of God like the CIA. The only time He makes the news is when He doesn’t prevent something. How many times through His grace as He stopped bad things from happening and we just aren’t aware of them? I don’t understand why He doesn’t always – why people have to suffer through no one’s choice – but, again, there’s lots that I don’t understand. But I do believe that through His providence He can redeem even the most horrendous circumstance, if we let Him.

God’s world isn’t the way it should be, but one day, it will be. When that happens all “faith will be made sight” and we’ll realize His mercy even in our pain.

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